Sustainable Gift-Giving Intentions

Great, zero to no-waste, gift giving ideas.

Over the years, I've struggled with gift-giving because I just felt the whole concept was "too much". I want to give meaningful, practical gifts while not spending unnecessary amounts of money as well as contributing to waste and clutter. And I don't want to contribute to superfluous excess. Fortunately our gift obligations only fall to one side of our family (the other side celebrates through food & company without gifts) and the list isn't too long. I'm in awe at the long lists I know others have...I empathize with those that have anxiety over it.  Lately, and probably more so in the future, I'm more inclined to give group gifts...like a food basket or a craft basket. I embrace the idea of consumable gifts like food and non-physical things like "an experience".  

My sincere intentions are still there...I want the gift receiver to like and enjoy what they're given and I still want them to feel that they are thought of fondly. That's the most important part of gift-giving that is sometimes lost in the consumerism of it all. Some years, along the way, I've felt so much pressure to give just the right "expensive" gift and feeling like whatever we're bringing might not be enough. 

Gradually through the years, I've been more intentional about my gift-giving: consumables like a pasta gift basket,a variety of teas, unique coffee (I was thrilled to receive those this year), a box of chocolates, popcorn treats, those kinds of things. Experiences like restaurant or movie gift certificates seem impersonal, but they're designed to help someone have an experience that they might not have taken on themselves. I also like giving bath, body, and beauty products. To be fair, the gifts I've been choosing to give are also gifts I would appreciate as well.  We've even gone to a restaurant this year we wouldn't have ordinarily gone to had we not received a gift card. My family also loves those chocolate and cookie tins that are readily available during the holidays.  They're festive and delicious, even if they often fall in the "guilty pleasure" category. And none of these things are big ticket items that can potentially break someone's bank, and if they are, please refrain from the whole process of gift giving altogether. I wish we could normalize just basking in the happiness of the holiday(s) being celebrated without having to spend money or time that may cause undue stress. 

Lastly, a simple greeting of well wishes goes a long way.  I love when people wish me whatever holiday greetings they prefer, just a nice text will do.  It means a lot and a positive and sincere sentiment will always be something I cherish. Nothing is better than a kind heart.  And I wish everyone light & love. 😘

   

The Illusion of Knowledge

Extended family reunions bring about all kind of feelings and emotions. For us, it's also a time to practice navigating highly possible toxic interactions with people in our lives that we can usually avoid a majority of the year. This particular holiday season was exactly that time for us. I'm sure we're not alone in dealing with that one (or a couple) of relatives that have every opinion as well as every judgement in the world to share with anyone who will listen. It's never about letting others make choices for themselves, but rather the belief that everyone is wrong and they are right. Period.  

 

But rather than dwell on those negative interactions, I wanted to reflect on how grateful I am for my immediate family--The Huz, The First-Born, and The Youngest. We have some very thought-provoking conversations about the issues that affect our lives. We don't always agree on everything, but we have productive discourse on things that matter to us. It is their opinion on societal events, religion, life choices etc that I refer to in my journey with my personal introspection. 

Something that The Youngest said resonated with me, "I never speak in the absolute.  I only know what I know until more data comes in."  Wise words from someone so young.  And words that I wish a couple of people in our lives would adhere to. These particular people are confident and sure about every opinion they hold: "facts" that can easily be disputed.  They hold judgements about how people identify, college choices, mask or no mask, vaccine no vaccine.  They see themselves as the epitome of human nature--in some self interpreted higher echelon of society.  But I say, no.  They are not.  We only know what we know.  And there's always room to learn more.

We recently had a health scare on my extended side of the family--a strange allergic reaction that involved not being able to breathe--which is a always a scary prospect. Thankfully, it was a good conclusion because that person is fine, but it also prompted a reflective conversation with my Mom about how thankful we both were.  At the time that we were speaking, we could've easily been having a sad time.  How delicate life is and as I get older, that realization is just becoming stronger and stronger which makes me double down even more on being open-minded, non-judgemental and kind to others. Clearly, that's not the route a couple people in our lives are taking, but as my quest for enlightenment continues, I realize they have to be true to themselves too. I just have to make sure my reactions, thoughts and feelings align with who I want to be--and make sure I limit my exposure to toxic people. And again, focus on being thankful for the people in my life that ground me and make me proud. 

Wishing everyone a very Happy New Year, new day and new ways to have a positive outlook! 😘

Honoring a Truck Full of Memories

The GMC Canyon came into our lives in January of 2005. The Huz had always wanted a truck and since we were already looking into purchasing another vehicle, we thought it was the perfect time to acquire one that was larger than what we were normally used to. From day 1, he was loved. What a gorgeous beautiful Truck he was. 

About 10 months after Truck became part of the family, I was ready to give birth to the Youngest, as my water broke in the middle of the night. This may be a little bit of "too much information", but hey it's all a reality of the birth process:  I was still leaking as we gathered our belongings to head to the hospital. I was already feeling all the emotions of giving birth and seeing my new baby very soon, but I was also worried that I would get fluid all over the still-very-brand-new truck. The Huz put towels on my seat and the floor to help protect it. I can see us in my mind nervous and excited driving to the hospital. So yes, the Truck was a big part of the wonderful memories associated with the birth of the Youngest.

And he continued to be an integral part of our lives as The Huz' used it to commute about an hour each way for work for several years.  Truck also took us to Legoland which is about a 2 hour drive each way almost every weekend, for a couple of years, when we had annual passes. He took us to Las Vegas, Big Bear, hauled the kids around wherever they needed to go and all the things a wonderful reliable vehicle needed to do. Along with his elegance, he was also strong as he hauled many of our big-size purchases, like whatever lumber pieces The Huz needed for projects, or whatever major appliances we needed to transport. The Huz was always so proud whenever Truck transported something heavy or huge.

17 years later with all the wear and tear a vehicle goes through, we had to make the heartbreaking decision to put the Truck to rest since his engine had finally died. It was not an easy decision. With all the sentimentality it held for everyone in our family, we tried to out weigh the cost of the repairs with the value of investing in saving him and we just couldn't conclude that it would be the right decision financially for the family. Again, it was a very difficult decision and I feel like we still agonize over it even though there's no turning back. 

On the very last day we had him, we were overwhelmed with emotions. I knew it was going to be hard, especially for The Huz, but I still wasn't prepared for the intensity of the hurt. To others, the Truck may have been just a scrap of metal, an inanimate object. But to us, he's a symbol of so many precious memories, moments, sharing in our joys...wonderful conversations during long drives and even short ones. Listening to music together, even if The Huz would rather turn the radio off. The Truck kept us safe all these years. I will always remember the Truck fondly and if there is ever such a thing as a "vehicle heaven" I hope he's there, living his best life remembering the family that loved him. 

Farewell, Mighty Beautiful Truck, you're in our hearts forever. 💛

"Too Late to Apologize: A Tale of Domestic Violence"

If you're in a domestic violence situation, please seek help.

Netflix's "Maid" touches upon the issue of domestic violence in a frustratingly realistic way.  It's never just one type of story, or one type of situation.  Domestic Violence can be in the form of emotional abuse, manipulation or control in a relationship. The limited series also touches upon the struggles one faces to rise above this situation and the multitude of players that can cause the uphill battle to be even steeper than one can imagine. There are many toxic relationships touched upon in this series that go beyond even just the initial romantic one and again, it's frustrating to see the main character have to navigate how to deal with them. Ultimately, there's always hope.  Keep going.  Keep trying.  If you're struggling with similar issues, please know that there is help out there for you. Seek it.  

I found the following short story on a Social Media page and felt compelled to share it in case it's something someone needs to read to propel them to get help.  

Inspirational Quotes Page

  ·

TOO LATE TO APOLOGISE

"Where are you coming from by this time of the night?"

He thundered.

"Honey you won't believe what happened today. Oh God I'm so tired right now."

She replied as she yawned.

"I asked where you are coming from and you are vomiting rubbish. Does that answer my question? Are you trying to pretend you don't know there's no food in this house?"

He said fuming.

"Honey I'm sorry but you should hear me out first. I...."

Before she could complete that sentence, a thunderous slap kissed her left cheek and she passed out on the floor.

"Get my dinner ready, after that you will tell me why you switched off your phone."

He said as he walked towards the bedroom.

When he noticed there was no response from his wife, he was infuriated.

He rushed towards her to unleash the rest of the demon in him but on getting close to her, he discovered she has passed out.

He was shocked.

Cold sweat appeared on his forehead and raced down his temple.

Fear gripped him.

He began to panic.

He dashed into the bedroom, picked his car key and darted out of the house to open his car.

He rushed back into the house almost immediately, lifted his wife and headed to his car.

As he made to start the ignition, the car key fell off his hand.

He was visibly shaking.

Picking up the car key proved to be a difficult task to him as he couldn't get hold of it.

He succeeded but had to use both hands to start the car ignition. His shaky hands turned against him.

His heart was racing.

He couldn't hold the steering firmly but he managed to drive his way to the hospital.

Getting to the hospital, he alerted the nurses. His wife was rushed into the emergency ward.

He became restless.

After about five minutes, his doctor appeared to him.

"Good evening Mr. Collins."

"Good evening doctor, how's my wife?"

He said with great panic.

"Your wife was here few hours ago. She brought your mum to the hospital before going home and if she had been ten minutes late, your mum would have died.

She wanted to alert you but her phone battery went flat. I would have called you but she said she will notify you when she get home. What really happened?"

The doctor asked.

"Doctor, is my wife okay?"

He asked with teary eyes.

"Your mum is in the other ward Mr Collins."

The doctor replied.

He couldn't hide his impatience as he gripped the doctor's shirt.

"What about my wife doctor? Is she okay?"

The doctor managed to pull his hands off his shirt before letting the cat out of the bag.

"I'm sorry Mr. Collins, your wife couldn't make it. She's dead.

He was shocked.

Cold shivers ran down his spine.

He began to shake.

Hot tears welled up his eyes and as he made an attempt to speak, they raced down his cheeks.

Liquid fluids leaked out of his nostrils and wetted his lips. His shirt became drenched with sweat.

He wanted to man up but he couldn't.

He groaned in pain and let out a mad shout.

"Noooooo!!!"

But then, it was too late to correct his mistake.

He should have heard her first as requested by her.

He should have controlled his anger.

He shouldn't have laid his hand on her.

He should have been patient with her.

He shouldn't have....

He should have....

But he didn't.

It was too late to apologize.

Don't make such a mistake.

SAY NO TO DOMESTIC VIOLENCE!!!

 

Books are the Journey and the Destination

If you enjoy contemporary romance novels, here's some recommendations for you. These are titles for 18+ readers. Find these selections at your favorite bookstores, online ebook vendors, or support your local library! I am truly thankful for the journey and the destination these stories provide. 😙

Wicked Beautiful by J.T. Geissinger:  Victoria is an author and motivational speaker for women's empowerment.  She's rich and beautiful.  But she's got a big secret. Parker is a successful restaurant chain owner that has had his share of women.  When he sees Victoria he feels like he knows her and having her/being with her becomes his priority.  As they begin to spend more time together, it becomes clear that they are both keeping things from each other & trust is not in the equation.  The truth, shocking as they are,  are all bound to come out sooner or later.  The question is, can they survive it all & remain together? 

 

 

Landon (In Safe Hands series) by S.M. Shade: When Landon is first introduced, he comes off as extremely over confident and arrogant.  I couldn't blame Zoe for not wanting to have anything to do with him.  But as fate would have it, Zoe ends up working for Landon and the story is off to a running start! So many things happen, so many revelations occur--lots of feelings, relationship troubles and crime-solving.  I know that may sound crazy and all over the place, but once you start reading, it all comes together.  I really enjoyed this story.  

 

 

 

Bewitching Winter (Book 3 of the Four Seasons series) by Serenity Woods:  Rhett and Neve had a previous romance that ended bitterly.  They had minimal contact with one another for about five years despite having mutual friends.  They end up at a marketing conference together and rather than ignore one another, they decide to try and catch up.  During the process of their reunion, a major revelation is made that changes Neve’s outlook.  She’s normally a hard person to crack, a person that easily holds grudges.  But can she forgive past mistakes in order to move forward into something lasting and loving with Rhett? The whole book is almost fully set during the marketing conference and what an eventful conference it turns out to be!