Go Ahead, Judge Me

One of my on-going challenges to better myself as a whole individual is to stop judging people. But let's face it, it's not always an easy end goal. My brain just automatically goes into judgement mode when I see or hear things. So with the inspiration of the article 8 Small Things You Do That People Use To Judge Your Personality, I decided to embrace the concept of judging and being judged and turn it into something that has the potential to inspire and engage positivity--after all, that's my ultimate goal (not perfection), always.

I'm sure this is true only some of the time, but I'm going with it!

• How clean and tidy your home is. This one is funny because the husband & I were just reminiscing the other day and looking at pictures before we had our kids and when our kids were babies.  In the pictures, you can see the rooms in our house. Let's just say, they're a lot less cluttered than they are now.  The boys have over-run our modest family home. It was already not abundant in space, but between their many toys, hobbies, collections & not to mention their backpacks, books etc....it's just harder to manage an ultra tidy home.  There are better days (and I try to make those more usual than not) & not so awesome days, so don't judge me. Or go ahead. After all, having a spotless home was never and is never going to be on the top of my priority list.  

  

  Gotta. Take. That. Selfie. :-P

• Your Selfie Style.  Oh man. This one is a tough one.  I always feel the criticisms creep into my subconscious when I see people post constant pictures of themselves. And those dreaded duck lip posts? Ugh. (See how judgmental I can be? Ugh. Sorry.) But I myself take endless pictures--granted most are not selfies, but the concept is pretty much the same.  When the boys were little, the Husband and I took photo after photo of them; in different outfits, wherever we went, whoever we encountered. We take several family pictures whenever & wherever we can too. Because of convenience we have been known to take family selfies (or felfies, as they are sometimes referred to) And in the past, I may have opted out of pictures, but lately I've made a conscious effort to be in them...because I want my children to look back and know that the husband and I were present in their lives. So, who am I to judge someone else picture-taking habits.  Maybe they are just happy with how they look? It's better than looking down on yourself, right? 

  

  I may have done this...maybe...possibly.

• Your Taste in Music. This totally falls under the "I could care less" category. My own personal style in music is so varied. I listen to everything from ballads, punk rock, rap, hip hop & even show tunes.  The only genre I've never connected with is country and heavy metal.  But honestly, other than the occasional grimace, I don't really judge people on this. Listen to any & all types of music that you like! And please, don't worry about judging me on my musical tastes. I'm not going to change anytime soon. 

  

  I like what this has to say, so this is acceptable judgment. Ha! :-) 

• Your Favorite Color. Really? People judge others based on this? My favorite color is baby blue because it reminds me of the beautiful sky. But I love wearing black (it goes with everything) and other than loud neon colors, I don't have strong feelings either way about colors.  So, judge away. I won't be wasting my time. 

  

  Cute, right? Dogs Vs. Cats...& the debate continues.

• Whether You're a Dog or Cat Person. Or in my case, a non-domestic animal person.  I don't "hate" dogs or cats or any pets in & of themselves.  I just prefer to not be saddled with the responsibility of taking care of them.  Am I a heartless person? No.  I consider myself an advocate for wildlife conservation and I believe animals have rights to live a life free from torture and abuse.  So, don't judge me as "unfeeling" for not having a pet.  And in regards to pet owners judging each other on dog vs. cat? Well, have at it.  Sounds relatively harmless. 

  

  I'm more concerned about your soul than your sole. See what I did there? :-D

• How Worn Your Shoes Are. I notice cute shoes. And then all I really think about is, "Wow, those are cute." My analyzation doesn't go much further than that.  More power to you if you are willing to take the time to look at the soles of people's shoes to figure out how confident they are or what not. I'm not going to waste time judging others on this and I'm not going to lose sleep when other people to choose to judge me as well. 

  

  Don't hurt animals.

• How You Treat Animals. This is similar to the "Dog or Cat" judging I previously touched upon.  I think how you choose to treat every living creature is good way of finding out what a person's personality is.  But some people are just more passionate about animals than others.  I don't think it means that one person is any more heartless than another.  Don't torture animals. Beyond that, I won't judge you. Maybe. :-P 

  

  Try to remember to ask questions and show interest in other people's lives.

• How Long it Takes you to Ask a Question. This is a tricky one.  I think, in general, people like to talk about themselves a lot. People want to share what they have done, what they do, how brilliant their kids are, etc...and forget or neglect to ask about the lives of who they are speaking to.  I tend to not enjoy talking about myself that much, so I don't mind conversing with someone who likes to talk, as long as the topic isn't too tedious or dare I say it, boring.  But conversations between two or more people completely open a person up for judgement because it's a way to get to know people.  So, you can make a blanket judgement like, "That person is nice", "That person is arrogant", "That person is a loving parent", etc... I guess the trick is to try to keep the judgements leaning towards being positive.  Some people are just going through things & need to express themselves.  You may be the only person they have that particular moment.  Judge wisely.    

As I was completing this entry, I came across a related article called A Harvard Psychologist says People Judge You on 2 Criteria When They First Meet You.  In this article, the focus is on judging someone based on whether someone is trustworthy and/or respectable. Those are not bad traits to look for in a person.

To judge or not to judge. No one's perfect, so just take it easy on people. General rule of thumb, strive for kindness.