All of us grandkids refered to my grandmother on my Mom's side as "Yeye". That name was born after the oldest grandchild, my cousin, couldn't vocally express the correct translation for grandmother, "Lola". The name/nickname stuck & that became her name/title. My memories of Yeye are meager since I left the Philippines when I was 5 years old--a lifetime ago. What I do remember though, is of a woman who had a great love for her family. She used to make sure we were always clean & often gave me baths. I believe that she passed on those loving traits to my Mom who then passed it on to me. I honor her with continuing to love & care for my family.
My mother is blessed enough, in the past few years, to have been able to make frequent trips back to the Philippines & stay for extended periods of time, making a second home there. In those times, she was able to reconnect with Yeye & show her as much love & appreciation as she could. Unfortunately, in the midst of these reunions, there were all kinds of family drama--push & pulls, expressions of greed, conflicts, etc that my Mom had to deal with & so often putting Yeye in the middle.
They continued to bond over the years & even as Yeye's health was failing, my Mom was there making sure she was good--at least when my Mom was physically in the Philippines. Many things happened, possible elderly neglect & what-not that I don't want to delve into mainly because I don't know the details & also because it's too painful to fathom. But Yeye finally passed away, most likely from organ failure & old age on August 6, 2018. She was 97 (give or take, since records are not that reliable).
My Mom took it unbelievably hard. She was by Yeye's side during her final days, showering her with love & attention till the very end and mourning her very deeply when she finally passed. She expressed to me that I wouldn't know how monstrous the pain is until she passes, & I lose my Mom. Believe me, just the thought brings me pain because the love I feel for my Mom is beyond explanation as well. Yeye was extremely loved by her daughter and I hope she knows and feels that love as she lives pain-free in the after life.
Within the past few months, my Mom has been dealing with her own health problems, we suspect originated because she neglected herself during the stressful & difficult times of caring for Yeye. It seems as though she's also dealing with guilt & putting the blame on herself for not physically being there for Yeye at all times (since she had to return to the States). As she begins the slow progress of healing & taking care of her own health, I wish my Mom peace & accepting that Yeye is at peace as well, pain-free & lovingly watching over her. I'm so thankful for my faith because it allows me a place to turn for guidance & my own comfort. I'm praying for you, Yeye (as well as for my grandfather, Wowo) to act as our intercessors & give my Mom strength & continued path to full good health.
And in that overall theme, I wish love, light & peace out into the world especially those struggling with grief.
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