As I'm in the midst of parenting teenagers/young adults, I find myself reflecting more and more on the importance of motherhood and all the challenges, triumphs, joys and fulfillment that comes with it.
As a child, I leaned toward being more obedient and hardly ever got in trouble in school. The Huz, however, was more mischievous and leaned toward resisting authority. He's got a lot of funny shenanigan stories, but I'm sure at the time it wasn't very amusing to the adults that had to deal with his behavior. When we had our own kids, I always thought that their personalities and behaviors could easily go either way.
My First-born was always very energetic. So as a toddler, we made sure he was always busy--playing, running around--so his energies would have a place to go. When it became time for him to go to Kindergarten, I worried that he would have a hard time sitting still & paying attention. Fortunately, he adjusted pretty well (although he still needs outlets for his energy) and I don't have any stand-out memories of having to deal with behavior problems (at least on his end) in school.
My Youngest was a much calmer baby, but super alert, sensitive and emotional. Through a recommendation from a friend, I was able to find and enroll him in a great Pre-school program sponsored by something similar to a HeadStart (or it might've been one, I can't remember). One day when I picked him up, I was approached by the teacher and told they had a hard day because the Youngest refused to write his name again & again (a practice exercise) because he said, "I already know how to write my name. I don't need to do that". I remember closing my eyes and thinking, here we go...I'll be that parent that gets called to meetings in the Principal's Office. (Yes, I'm a big worry-wart). So, we got in the car and I spoke calmly to my then four-year-old and I told him I know what happened today and that he needs to follow directions and do whatever assignment the teacher tells him to do. He said the same thing to me, "but I already know how to write my name." I told him that I know that, and he knows that, but in school, you have to keep practicing, keep learning and following directions. I also told him that he will have a hard time if he keeps arguing with his teachers. School is largely about following rules. I never yelled at him. I didn't even scold him. I just talked to him on his level and explained what is expected of him in school. Then when I dropped him off the next day, I crossed my fingers and hoped for the best. When I picked him up, I wasn't sure what to expect. When I spoke to the teacher, I held my breathe to see what report I would be receiving and she proceeds to tell me, "I don't know what you did, but he didn't argue with me today. Just did his work." Wow. What a relief. And it's been that way ever since with him--just explain things and he pretty much gets it.
Over the years, I'm not going to sugar coat it and say that it's been complete smooth sailing. Raising kids is never that easy. They will talk back. They will be moody. They will challenge you. Have I had my fair share of yelling and repeating things...yes & yes!! I mean, I still do. I've also attributed many of my grey hairs to this tough job called parenting. The teenage years are not a joke (and mine are relatively mild mannered, and still...). Parenting never stops. The worry continues. The process is on-going.
But my boys are kind. I love being able to say that and really mean it. They are both accomplished kids with many achievements under their belts and God-willing, more goals to set and complete. And I pray for them and I cheer them on...silently and loudly--whichever is most appropriate at any given time (LOL). They are growing up and they are having to figure things out on their own--making life choices and accepting the rewards and/or consequences of those choices. But their hearts are kind. They are humble. They have empathy and compassion for others.
The Huz and I are proud parents.
As always, wishing everyone light & love! XOXO 😘
No comments:
Post a Comment