We Don't Look Like That Anymore (Memories)

Shutterfly sent me an email reminding me of these pictures taken in April of 2013. I love these surprise little "gifts" that show up that make my already grateful heart even more thankful of what truly matters in life.

They are now 16 & 19 & suffice is to say are much larger now. 😊

These two boys have been the subject of our photography for so many years.📸 I'm sure many parents relate--every moment feels special and it feels necessary to capture it. As I look at this particular picture, I see two boys that have changed so much yet, remain the same in numerous ways (their personalities have matured and obviously they're much deeper thinkers but their core characters are still very much there). We had so much fun with them as little boys, and we still continue to enjoy our quality time with them as young adults. To see places, things and events through the eyes of the offspring that you've raised and love beyond anything is a gratifying experience.  I value who they are and I'm immensely proud of them.
 

They still enjoy hanging out with each other.

I didn't have a healthy relationship with my father growing up and have a non-existent one as an adult. So, seeing the strong bond that The Huz has with the boys has always been incredible for me and I've always viewed their relationship with great reverence and appreciation. It goes without saying that he loves them beyond words, but if love can be seen as something tangible, I feel like one would literally be able to see it radiating out of him. He shows his devotion to them by being present and available for them for the important things but also for just shooting the breeze and a fun conversation. It's a bond that didn't just materialize when the boys hit a certain age.  It started from birth with his constant presence as their biggest cheerleader. As they grow further into adulthood, the bond is even stronger laced with not just a solid father & sons connection, but also a true and genuine friendship.

They're my little ones, even though now I'm technically "the little one".

I remember either seeing a meme or maybe reading an article about the importance of mothers taking pictures with their children because we get busy and focused on raising them we forget to be IN the myriad of pictures we take OF them. It's solid advice. I've been lucky to have a dreamy experience with motherhood. What I mean by that is that I super enjoyed getting to raise them and felt the joys of the stages of their development and milestones. We've made the best memories I endlessly cherish. That's not to say that I never felt exceptionally tired at times and immensely frustrated other times. My circadian rhythm will never be the same since becoming a mother and I'm not convinced that I've completely come out of what is cheekily referred to as "the mom fog". Parenthood and specifically motherhood is not some utopian experience (and if it is, good on you), but rather a series of some astounding ups and defeating downs. It's gigantic feelings of stress and worry and hoping--praying that decisions we make on their behalf are not damaging them. It's occasions of feeling tremendously proud of their accomplishments and feeling blessed at the phenomenal people they are. 

Motherhood is not a linear experience. It's a lot.  And it's all worth it.