We Don't Look Like That Anymore (Memories)

Shutterfly sent me an email reminding me of these pictures taken in April of 2013. I love these surprise little "gifts" that show up that make my already grateful heart even more thankful of what truly matters in life.

They are now 16 & 19 & suffice is to say are much larger now. 😊

These two boys have been the subject of our photography for so many years.📸 I'm sure many parents relate--every moment feels special and it feels necessary to capture it. As I look at this particular picture, I see two boys that have changed so much yet, remain the same in numerous ways (their personalities have matured and obviously they're much deeper thinkers but their core characters are still very much there). We had so much fun with them as little boys, and we still continue to enjoy our quality time with them as young adults. To see places, things and events through the eyes of the offspring that you've raised and love beyond anything is a gratifying experience.  I value who they are and I'm immensely proud of them.
 

They still enjoy hanging out with each other.

I didn't have a healthy relationship with my father growing up and have a non-existent one as an adult. So, seeing the strong bond that The Huz has with the boys has always been incredible for me and I've always viewed their relationship with great reverence and appreciation. It goes without saying that he loves them beyond words, but if love can be seen as something tangible, I feel like one would literally be able to see it radiating out of him. He shows his devotion to them by being present and available for them for the important things but also for just shooting the breeze and a fun conversation. It's a bond that didn't just materialize when the boys hit a certain age.  It started from birth with his constant presence as their biggest cheerleader. As they grow further into adulthood, the bond is even stronger laced with not just a solid father & sons connection, but also a true and genuine friendship.

They're my little ones, even though now I'm technically "the little one".

I remember either seeing a meme or maybe reading an article about the importance of mothers taking pictures with their children because we get busy and focused on raising them we forget to be IN the myriad of pictures we take OF them. It's solid advice. I've been lucky to have a dreamy experience with motherhood. What I mean by that is that I super enjoyed getting to raise them and felt the joys of the stages of their development and milestones. We've made the best memories I endlessly cherish. That's not to say that I never felt exceptionally tired at times and immensely frustrated other times. My circadian rhythm will never be the same since becoming a mother and I'm not convinced that I've completely come out of what is cheekily referred to as "the mom fog". Parenthood and specifically motherhood is not some utopian experience (and if it is, good on you), but rather a series of some astounding ups and defeating downs. It's gigantic feelings of stress and worry and hoping--praying that decisions we make on their behalf are not damaging them. It's occasions of feeling tremendously proud of their accomplishments and feeling blessed at the phenomenal people they are. 

Motherhood is not a linear experience. It's a lot.  And it's all worth it.

 

Nothing is Taken for Granted, Everything is a Gift

I've been feeling a little mentally off lately. I'm not sure if it's a reaction to the empathy I feel for situations around me--wordly or far off and some closer to me personally. I'm trying to meditate and control the unnecessary worrying that I sometimes fall into because I know that just allows me to suffer twice. In the past, I would try to minimize my melancholy and/or anxiety (for lack of a better description for my "off" feelings) but now I know that it's okay to feel this way and with time, hopefully, it does pass on by. And from personal experience, it does.  It's a reminder to take care of my mental health and to concentrate on the things that bring much joy to my life--the loves in my life, the simplicity versus the chaos, and the long list of things I'm always thankful for.  

Simple joys: morning coffee, walking for movement and exercise & husband massages. 💗

The following art and poem is sad because this feels relevant to so many lives around me. That one flower seems far and unreachable, but there are flowers closer to you that you just haven't seen.

Please, turn around.

 

You're single and you need company.

You're in a relationship and you lack freedom.

You work and no time.

You have too much time on your hands and you'd like to work.

You're young and you wanna grow up to do adult things.

You're an adult and you like to do young people's things.

You're in your city but you wish you lived somewhere else.

You're somewhere else but you'd like to go back to your city...

Maybe it's time to stop always looking at what we lack and start living in the present, truly appreciating what we do have.

Enjoy the scent of your home before opening the door and going out in search of the perfumes of the world.

Because nothing is taken for granted, and everything is a gift.

Give it courage!

- Unknown Author

The Justification of a Slap Heard Round the World

Because I felt such strong emotions, I've given myself some time to reflect on Will Smith assaulting Chris Rock at the Oscars. My initial reaction was horror and disbelief at the act itself, but when I took to the internet and saw the comments of support for Will Smith, my feelings turned to disappointment in humanity. I couldn't grasp, and still can't, the concept that people were rooting for a man hitting another man because he said some awful things about his wife. 

I'm not going to even argue on that particular point. Insulting jokes are always hurtful. People should speak out on that and defend others from hateful speech.  As someone who advocates kindness above all else, I couldn't agree more with that notion. Words do matter. I've been in the direct line of hateful and unkind words and I, firsthand, know and relate to how painful being on that end can be.  And everyone should be mindful of what they say to others because we don't know what someone is going through and that one awful moment of hateful words can affect them in ways that are unfathomable.

But the solution to Chris Rock's irreverent comedy is not a punch to the face. For me, that stance is non-negotiable. Will Smith intentionally rose from his chair, calmly walked over to the microphone where Chris Rock was doing "a shtick" and proceeded to punch or slap him in the face, walked back to his seat then proceeded to yell out profanities to Chris Rock justifying why he did what he just did.  Chris Rock, to his credit, responded awkwardly then continued on with the show.

Then I started reading the comments: good for Will for defending his wife. How dare Chris Rock talk about Will's wife like that. He deserved it. Then I also heard from women: that's how you defend someone you love.  Or, I wish I  had a man who stood up for me like Will did for his wife. 

As a wife and mother of two sons, I can honestly say that I would never want either The Huz or my Sons to react in the way Will Smith did. Apart from the unwarranted violence, he reacted in an impulsive manner that in any other situation would have had dire consequences...a return punch that may have resulted in more violence and/or legal action.  There is always a better way to handle unkind interactions and punching someone is not one of those ways. It was not self-defense. It was a violent attack. Will Smith is in the privileged and unique position to have a strong platform in speaking out against bullying.  And he could have taken this opportunity to speak out against the insult that was directed toward his wife--bring more awareness to her medical condition and truly bring a voice to the struggles that people inflicted with it face. But instead, his actions took away, not only from the powerful awareness of the condition, but of the historical and magical night of him winning an Academy Award.

To his credit, Will made a public apology to Chris a day later.

 

I'm still trying to process that a major part of society who has opinions on this incident, are defending Will Smith and agreeing with his actions. For me, he did the wrong thing. As I've heard others say, full stop.  That's it.  Will Smith is, was wrong in hitting Chris Rock. And it breaks my heart that that stance is unpopular.  💔

Violence, in this case, was the wrong choice.

Redeeming Love: A Story that Touched my Heart (A Feature Film)

I came upon this movie just as a happenstance when I was scrolling through the movie section of a streaming service we currently have. I'm not going to promote that service because movies often come and go and jump around between streaming services.  I'm lucky to have had the chance to watch it as the subject and story, although extremely hard to watch at times, came full circle into an inspiring journey of loss, hardship, forgiveness, strength and love. 

The character of Micheal was unreal in the most hopeful way. The Huz, who was watching with one eye (and interested, I may add) while working at the same time, kept saying, "there's something wrong with him," and he meant it in the best way.  Michael is kind, non-judgemental, open minded, understanding and forgiving. He's the epitome of what a "Christian" person should aspire to, and unfortunately, I've never truly seen in actual life (although I've encountered many a "preaching" Christian). 

The character of Angel is a multi-faceted person,  having dealt with the hardships of life at a very young age through no fault or choosing of her own. She is understandably hardened by life and cynical of any goodness or kindness she encounters. 

Michael and Angel are the two main characters in the film, but there are a host of side characters to round out this very full story--characters you will feel the utmost sympathy for as well as characters you want to throw on the side of a boat in an ocean of hungry sharks. 🙅 Not sorry about it. 😑

I can tell you, while watching this movie, I found myself sad and angry about human nature. But there's also so many chances to feel hopeful as well.  And while I thought choosing this movie to watch was just to pass the time and maybe feel entertained, I felt that I received more from it that I would ever have expected. It's drama-filled.  And again, it's hard to watch at times, but there is a reason for everything and I did feel a payoff from my emotions. Because of the subject matter, this is for mature audiences only.  And it was also a movie adapted from a novel so read that too, if you're so inclined. 

   

Not About Gas Prices

As we waited in a gas line at 7am--a line that I've never seen formed at my regular station before this day--I was feeling all kinds of feelings about the situation. It made me think about the past two years and seeing people unfavorably react to situations outside of their comfort zone...shortages of toilet paper because people were hoarding, extremely long lines at popular grocery stores even though there were other places that didn't have lines, and people making current events into angry political discussions (does the Virus even exist, should we wear a mask or not, is the vaccine meant to microchip us?). I feel like everything that happens is somehow designed to yet again, polarize people and create a triggering argument (not a civil discussion) about one thing or another. 

I'm privileged that I'm able to go about my days feeling relatively safe. I live in a comfortable home with people I love. Our kitchen is well-stocked and are even able to enjoy a nice meal out every once in a while. We are able to enjoy entertainment in various forms (streaming services, books, music, video games and more) and going back to the subject of cars and gas, we're able to access transportation and get where we need to go. 

Are there ups and downs? Yes.  Always. Such as life. And it's ok to feel awful and even wallow in your sorrows when necessary.  But along with those moments, there is (and it's not just a famous saying) there is always, always something to be thankful for. 

Also, when things like increased gas prices, or supply shortages, or whatever else is going on in any given current time, we have to make adjustments in how we conduct life. One social media acquaintance posted that she decided she was going to make her own coffee instead of going to her daily franchise stop (there is so much savings in this choice). We re-adjust our budget when necessary, make cuts where we need to and lifestyle revamping (like maybe eating out less). It's all part of life and we're still more privileged than someone having bombs go off around them or calling a shelter your home. 

I'm not trying to minimize anyone's thoughts or feelings on whatever subject they want to rant about or dwell on. If that's what you want to do, do it. But I choose to just take things day-by-day, and focus on what I'm thankful for, always hoping that situations get better. 

Sending light & love out into the universe. 😘

 

When Ignorance Screams, Intelligence Shuts Up (A Short Story)

 This story is the moment. 💥I'm more than happy to share these words of wisdom. 💁

The donkey told the tiger: The grass is blue.

The tiger replied: No, the grass is green​.

The discussion became heated, and the two decided to submit the issue to arbitration, and to do so they approached the lion.

Before reaching the clearing in the forest where the lion was sitting on his throne, the donkey started screaming: ′′Your Highness, isn't it true that the grass is blue?"​

The lion replied: "True, the grass is blue"​.

The donkey rushed forward and continued: ′′The tiger disagrees with me and contradicts me and annoys me. Please punish him"​.

The king then declared: ′′The tiger will be punished with 5 years of silence"​.

The donkey jumped with joy and went on his way, content and repeating: ′′The grass is blue"​..

The tiger accepted his punishment, but he asked the lion: ′′Your Majesty, why have you punished me, after all, the grass is green?"​

The lion replied: ′′In fact, the grass is green"​.

The tiger asked: ′′So why do you punish me?"​

The lion replied:

That has nothing to do with the question of whether the grass is blue or green. The punishment is because it is not possible for a brave, intelligent creature like you to waste time arguing with a donkey, and on top of that to come and bother me with that question.

The worst waste of time is arguing with the fool and fanatic who doesn't care about truth or reality, but only the victory of his beliefs and illusions. Never waste time on discussions that make no sense... There are people who for all the evidence presented to them, do not have the ability to understand, and others who are blinded by ego, hatred and resentment, and the only thing that they want is to be right even if they aren’t.

When ignorance screams, intelligence shuts up. Your peace and tranquility are worth more.

-- Adapted from an unknown Author

 

Meat-Eater Reviews Store-Bought Plant-Based Products

In an effort to incorporate more meatless meals into our food rotation, I've been exploring plant-based, meatless, and Vegan products that are easy to prepare and ready to go. For me, it's not a debate between carnivores and vegans.  I know where each stand and I don't hate-on or disrespect either side especially since I myself have not given up eating meat. However, I also know that a diet less dependent on meat is not only good for an individual (most often) but also for the environment and yes, less impact on the cruelty to animals. There are many amazing and delicious plant-based and Vegan recipes out there that I also enjoy attempting, but these reviews will be for a few ready-to-eat (with some easy preparation) products that are available in stores. Be open-minded and be kind. 😘

Field Roast Miniature Plant-Based Corn Dogs (Sam's Club)

I put these in my air-fryer at 330 degrees for 20 minutes. They came out nicely browned and in my opinion, looking quite appealing.

After letting them cool for a few minutes, I went it on these lil' babies. First impression after the first bite: they definitely look and feel like a corn dog. The unusual thing that stood out to me wasn't even the "sausage" that is inside, but the cornbread outer layer. It's kind of powdery or sandy which is distracting. I took a second bite to concentrate on the "sausage" itself and felt that it was just ok, not hugely packed with flavor (I'm a season-your-food type of girl). I also dunked it in some ketchup for the authentic corn dog experience. If no one told me it was plant-based, I don't think I would even question it--maybe wonder about the outer coating--but that's it. The product itself is not super delicious so it isn't something I would crave or seek out.  But it's a good product and I would have no problem eating it again. 

unMeat Meat-free Sausages Hungarian Style (Seafood City SoCal)

There's an outer clear casing that must be gently removed before you cook them. I cooked them with water in a pan until they looked ready, threw them on a hot dog bun with cheese, then put them in the oven until the cheese melted.

They are slightly paler than a meat hot dog. The bite on these is soft with zero snap which, I believe, alerts a regular meat eater to these being different. The taste is also milder, not as salty or as flavorful as a typical hot dog.  I didn't hate these. But if I'm being honest, I didn't enjoy them enough to want to get them again. I feel like there might be other plant-based products out there that could be better. All-in-all though, it wasn't bad. 🤷

Yummy Meatless Vegetable Patties (Grocery Outlet or Ralphs)

This was a fun product to try because I didn't tell The Huz it was a meatless product & I put it in a sandwich.  He was expecting it to be a fried chicken patty and was appropriately surprised when it turned out to be something else. On the outside, it looks like a chicken patty especially after a turn in the air fryer, crispy in texture. But on the inside, it doesn't attempt to disguise what it is.  You can see the vegetables: carrots, cauliflower, corn and potato all throughout the inside. There is nothing memorable about the flavor, but it isn't awful either.  Again, if you're trying to limit your meat intake and want something fast and easy this is a good option.  It's not a faux meat substitute either.  It is truly a vegetable patty and proud of it. 

Jimmy Dean Plant-Based Patty Croissant (Sam's Club)

This is an easy microwave heat and serve product. It has a look and texture of a meat sausage and I believe it can legitimately pass for one if the person eating it was never told it is actually plant-based. As someone who knew it wasn't, I did detect a milder flavor on the sausage. But it was okay for me and I actually don't mind eating this for a quick breakfast. The bread is nice and soft, and the egg and cheese are what you expect it to be. Please note, with the addition of the egg and cheese, this is not a full vegan product.