An End to a "Friendship" Long Overdo

The older I get, the more I realize that experiences are often shared.  When I'm going through something, I think, could this really be happening? Would others relate? More often than not, the answer is yes. So, today I'm focusing on that one "friendship" that just doesn't make sense because it's two energies that are just not compatible. But for some reason, it endures the test of time because of life circumstances.  And then finally, it just has to end--for the peace of one or both parties. I experienced that full circle moment this week.  And I can honestly say, it's an end that definitely has a new beginning for me.
     It all began so many years ago.  Becoming friends with someone because our kids went to the same school, fighting the same fight, supporting our kids in extracurricular activities.  I've always considered myself a positive person--someone who seeks out the bright lights, the person who understands the concept of going high instead of hitting low.  Throughout the years, this person was the opposite of these qualities.  She always had a conflict with someone, a criticism of one person or another, a wrong that was done to her or her family etc. etc.  And as a supportive friend, I always listened. Always wanted to see the positive.  And there often were! We had some great times, fun conversations, but also frustrating moments. There were many times I would share my frustrations with members of my immediate family. And I have to say, it was difficult not to get negative about it which is something that I never want to cultivate. I've seen her lose so many people over the years, but each situation was never her fault. She was always wronged.
     As I'm getting older, raising & watching my sons grow closer to adulthood, I want them to seek out people in their life that will make them better people. In looking back, I often felt so many moments of negative surging rising within me in her presence.  Even the way she spoke about members of her family would either make me cringe due to the excessive boasting or hurt for the angry words towards an elderly relative. She has maligned other students--children--for the sake of her ego--even saying hateful words about people with special needs.  Hurtful things I never stood by, but also never called her out on--to keep the peace.  She has a kind side, a generous side, a compassionate side that can make a person lower their guard, but if you somehow get on her bad side (whatever her criteria of that is), she can poison you with her words.  Many have been on the receiving end of these attacks.
     Another friend of ours sent me an article on narcissism, and it was so spot-on with her personality. It made me realize that I can't control others, but I can control my reactions to someone & also who I decide to invite into my presence. After so many years of being surrounded by her drama, witnessing her hurt others & somehow make it seem as though her & her loved one are/were victims, she sent me a nasty text ending our friendship because I decided to remain friends with someone who she has vilified and who she insists has made her & her loved one a victim--forever it seems.  I refuse to be a part of that circle.  I accept her spurning our "friendship" as Divine intervention and what is meant to be for my life.  I release myself from the swirling of anger and hate.

 

I don't want to harbor resentment. I don't have room for that in my life.  And I don't know if she'll malign me with others or post hateful passive-aggressive messages on her Social Media, which she is well-known to do--but I'm going to choose to let it all go--to let a "friendship" go that needed to end.  And although she claims she has no use for my good wishes, I still offer it up. Because I want happy people on this earth--there's too much hate and anger already. 

   And moving forward, I will continue to be choosy about my friendships.  Just as it exists in my immediate circle, I want to be surrounded by positive & kind people.